


What I Hold Back

by StrangeStardust13



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Pseudo-Incest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-05-16 17:05:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19322437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrangeStardust13/pseuds/StrangeStardust13
Summary: Incidents where Alex and Kara admit their feelings, even if they don't mean to.





	1. Part 1: Alex

Alex Danvers lived her daily life on repeat, the same mission for each one ; Protect Kara. It got harder each year as her feeling about the little alien flew from envy to annoyance to love then finally stopping at absolute adoration. Kara Zor-El was her entire life, and she would stop at nothing to keep her safe. But that was before, and now Alex had a new mission: Destroy anyone who prevented her from purifying the world of aliens, and that's exactly what she would do.

Kara knew the moment she saw her 'sister' that something was wrong, but what she learned made her heart ache. As soon as the Danvers girl saw the Kryptonian, she grabbed her by the throat feeling her pulse spike under her clenching fist. "Oh does poor little Kara need air?" The enhanced human snarled throwing Kara away from her as if she weighed nothing. When the blonde stood, she felt tears threaten to escape but fought them down. "Alex, please stop this." The blonde gestured her arms to the rubble around them, Alex had began her mission early. Destroying anything with connections to alien life. The brunette only laughed as she stalked to her adopted "sister" swinging her blade and she moved. "You know, you hurt me. When you said those things, about us never being sisters. But you were right, I have no sister." With the last word she swung her sword watching as it slashed through the hero's suit and spilling blood from her arm. Supergirl cried out in agony as the Kryptonite did its job, scrambling away from her former home personified she began to beg. "Alex, please don't do this. You don't really want to hurt me! This isn't you!" She let her tears fall then, her heart breaking at the older woman's response. "Maybe not back when my mind was corrupted by you," she scoffed as she stalked forward, blade ready to slice again "I used to care about you, I ADORED you. Looking back I am SO glad my mother forced the role of sister down my throat." The hero forced herself up, she had to keep Alex talking if she wanted to survive this and she knew it "What's that supposed to mean Alex? Don't you like having a little sister?" Kara made her voice small, mocking even in order to find her answers. Alexandra's eyes grew wide as she snarled in response "A Little Sister?! You were a PLAGUE! You have no idea what you did to me!" She cried out, cutting through the ground when she missed the bonde's throat. The blonde put her back to the brick behind her, "then tell me, Alex. Please, what did I do to you? How can I make it up to you?" The newly enhanced human laughed, a dry echo of its former glory. "You can't! You stupid alien, you don't get it! You made me as DISGUSTING as you are. You took away my life! My father! But that just wasn't good enough for you was it? You had to pervert me! You made me sick, and twisted! You made me adore you, want you. LUST for you!" With each accusation, she swung her blade again. On the final swing, the hero reacted grabbing Alex and pushing her down until she straddled the human. Kara's tears didn't have time to dry and she pressed her mouth against the human's using the distraction to destroy the trance the brunette was in. 

Back in the DEO hospital wing, Alex had just woke up. Tears openly ran down her face as she apologised to her sister. Once the day was done though, Kara was stopped by J'onn. "when are you going to tell her what she said to you?" The martian asked, a single tear slipped down the blonde's cheek. "Never. " she answered before flying away. She couldn't tell Alex the truth, Kara couldn't risk the loss of Alex Danvers again.


	2. Part 2: Kara

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara goes through another incident with red-K.

It had been three months. " I ADORED YOU!" "You were a PLAGUE!" "You made me as DISGUSTING as you are." "You made me adore you, want you. LUST for you!" For each screamed memory, a blow landed on the punching bag in front of Kara. It had been three months, but her "sister's" words never stopped haunting her. Then the call came through, the very brown eyes the blonde tried to hide from latched on to her own as the words spilled past her lips. "Go save the city, Supergirl." The smile on her face proved that she still didn't know, assured her that she never would. But then, things can always change.

Kara had successfully saved a school bus, a cat from a tree, and six people from an avalanche but work was never done for her. So as she flew to the old warehouse where a distressed cry for help had come from, she thought nothing of going to do just that. But there was something familiar about the sickeningly sweet smell that hit her, and she knew. Red kryptonite was re-entering her system before she could flee. 

Two days passed as Kara did all she could to avoid her sister as she had been for the last three months, but then why should she? Because Alex had some dirty thoughts as a hormonal teenager? For someone who WASN'T her sibling? Kara thought as she turned back towards the brunette's office, a smile creeping on her face. 'I could have her worshipping me if I chose, just like everyone else on this planet.' And that was exactly what she planned to have happen. Upon entering her "sister's" laboratory, she gave a nasty look to the shy tech before watching him flee the room in fear of her. 'He should be scared' the once hero thought 'He was too close to MY Alex' and the more Kara thought about the title, the more she wanted to hear Alex Danvers' breathless voice say that was exactly who she was. Alex barely looked up from her work as she heard Kara's footsteps approach. "hey, Kar. Are we still on for tonight?" the older Danvers asked nonchalantly, waiting for yet another excuse of why she couldn't hang out to leave the blonde's lips, but no such excuse was born. Her only reply was a simple "absolutely." As she heard the hero's clicking heels as she left. 

At the end of the day, Alex was left in her apartment with two empty bottles of Jack Daniels. Once again her sister had stood her up, or so she thought. As Kara floated through the open window, Alex felt an off shift in the air before even noticing that the blonde was still in her Supergirl apparel. "You didn't change?" the brunette questioned, an eyebrow quirked as she stood to hug her favorite alien. To say she was surprised to find herself with the her back on the couch was an understatement and the only thing she felt besides her hammering heartbeat was her sister's deep inhale of air against her neck. "Kara, are you drunk?" she stammered out before lightly pushing at the blonde's chest. A low rumble left the smaller woman's throat. "Maybe, why do you want me to be Alex?" she cocked her head to the side, the way she did when she first came to earth. She could feel her plan working in Alex's quickened pulse, her dear human was getting turned on. "I can be anything you'd like me to be, you know." Kara whispered the words against her sibling's ear, her lips ghosting over her neck. The older Danvers pushed at her adopted sister again shoving them apart. "What's going on with you Kara? You haven't acted like this since the red K incident." As the words left her mouth Alex's eyes widen and she jolted off the couch to get her phone. Kara shook her head as her superspeed kicked in, she held the cellphone away from her target, shaking her head as if to scold her. "No, no, Alex. You're all mine tonight, and we need to talk." The blonde stressed the last word as she yanked her sibling's arm hard throwing her back on the couch before crowding her into the corner. The hero's face contorted into a pout as she softened her voice "You hurt my feelings those months ago, Alex. You were really mean to me! And you said some VERY NAUGHTY things to me Alex." The human's breath caught in her throat at the last of the Kryptonian's words. "No, Kara. I didn't mean anything I said." Kara shifted further against Alex, until she was nearly in her lap. "I think you DID mean it Alex. I think you meant every.single.word." as she said the last of the sentence, kara ran her forefinger down the brunette's lip and throat daring her to object. "We need to just forget about those things Kara, it was wrong and I wasn't myself." Alex tried to insist, but the red k in Kara's system quickly made her tire of slow seduction, and Kara wanted Alex to admit she was hers. As if she had been slapped, Kara jerked before forcing Alex against the wall near the window. "Damnit Alex! Just admit it!" The blonde ran her hand across the other woman's chest and stomach. "You still want me, hell you ALWAYS have. That's why you couldn't keep a boyfriend. That's why you insisted on going away for college! You were afraid of what you would try DESPERATELY to talk me into." Alex shook her head roughly, until kara's hand pressed hard into her jaw to still her, before placing a rough hot kiss on her mouth. "Admit it! Even if you deny it I know the truth, you told me when you tried to kill me! And even before then, I could HEAR you at night. I knew what you did in your room when your breathing became ragged and your skin was red and flushed." and with the last words kara's hand rubbed across her chest and down to Alex's belt. The only response was a guilty whimper from the brunette and her bottom lip began to tremble. And she finally whispered the truth "I wanted you Kara, I admit it." Alex hung her head, before she felt soft fingers tuck under her chin. Alex's brown eyes met Kara's blue and she knew she had just delivered her own death sentence. "Tell me you want this, don't lie." She squeezed her eyes shut as she whimpered out the truth she kept for years. "I want you Kara, I always have." With a satisfied smile, and a deep kiss to Alex's lips Kara slipped her hand under the waistband of the DEO agent's slacks searching greedily for her goal as her mouth latched to Alex's neck. The moan that left her lips sounded foreign to Alex, as her hands fought against the top of Kara's outfit. "Kara, Kar please!" she was near tears as she tugged at her adopted sibling's top. The blonde ending her assault on the agent's throat in order to tease her more. Donning her speech patterns from when she first came to earth Kara pulled her new lover to the bedroom, and with her head cocked to the side like a puppy she asked. "Please what Alexandra Danvers?" Sitting on her knees, Kara continued "I don't understand." Alex nearly growled as she yanked the suit's top up and off the blonde's body. Kara grinned as she watched her humans eyes darken with lust, and began to undo the slacks before shifting to the floor and pushing Alex down on the bed. It took exactly seven minutes and fifteen seconds for Alex to scream out Kara's name with the blonde's head between her legs. Teeth and nails attacked the Kryptonians flesh as she continued her all too welcome assault on the agent's body. And in the light of the morning not a soul knew, not about the bruises that lovingly littered Alex's body or the memory of her teeth pressing hard against Kara's skin. Not a single soul knew of the night before, but the Danvers girls knew and now, nothing could be the way it was.


End file.
